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Contents • • • • Plot [ ] Brian Stimpson (Cleese), headmaster of, has been elected to chair the annual. Extremely disorganised as a young man, Stimpson is now obsessively organised and punctual, and his school runs 'like clockwork'. He is the first headmaster of a comprehensive school to chair the Headmasters' Conference, that honour usually being reserved for heads of the more elite.
Despite repetitive rehearsal of his speech and preparations for the journey to the conference, Stimpson's ordered world unwinds as a series of misadventures plague him en route. He misses the train to, loses the text of his speech, and is left at the train station by his wife, who thinks he departed on the train. Frantic to get to Norwich on time, Stimpson searches for his wife at home and at the hospital where she volunteers, but just misses her.
Commandeering the car of a sixth form student, Stimpson travels to the conference with the student, called Laura. Stimpson's wife sees him with Laura at a petrol station and assumes the worst; that her husband is carrying on with the student and bringing her along to attend the conference. Stimpson (who is looking after three senile women) drives after Stimpson and both parties forget to pay for their petrol.
The police are called and, responding to an auto theft call from Laura's parents as well, attempt to find Stimpson and arrest him for kidnapping. Stimpson's wife, Laura's parents, the police and Mr. Jolly, a teacher at Thomas Tompion who has secretly been dating Laura, all pursue Stimpson and Laura to the conference. En route, Stimpson and Laura try to call the conference by a telephone box. A local mistakes them for vandals when the phones don't work and calls the police. The local sends her daughter to Stimpson, the daughter turns out to be a childhood friend and former girlfriend of Stimpson. Stimpson coerces her into driving them to the Conference.